Growing up in the 60’s, life was so simple. Read my diary. You will see. The Above picture has all my siblings and cousins from dads side and I love all of them. And I can say with conviction that they love me and I can count on them.
How did we complicate it?
Is it all because of mobiles and social networking? Is it feminism? Is it our individualistic mindset? Are the comforts to be blamed?
We knew that life is not meant to be perfect. We had struggles but we overcame them. We did not need psychiatrists. Sure, we felt like dying but we had hope and love and trust. Our struggles made us stronger. We struggled within ourselves, our life was not broadcast, we did not need to always have a happy profile. We fought and made up and understood and tried to understand.
In my marital adapting, I learned after few years that communicating your feelings has a profound impact on the relationship. I married my husband after knowing him for 15 days. And then moved to America. Of course, there were struggles. I will not say that the D word was not thought of. But we endured.
And now you say, why did you? We did it for you. And of course, we did not have financial freedom, so we latched on because of that too. It was so much better handling the burdens together. After about 45 years of togetherness, we are comfortable with each other. And right now, we are bearing the fruits. Do not tell us we did it all wrong when we have just learned to turn our reflexes off.
There must be some reason you liked your partner. I say again, communicating is your best aid. Who has not heard ‘Men are from mars, and women are from Venus’. In order to bring both to earthly terms, communication is the key. They do not understand why you are sulking. Unless you tell them so they can improve. It is hard, I agree. But believe me, I have seen over years and experience, the other choices are harder. Strive hard, work for your beliefs, communicate harder, stay strong and work for what you think is right.
Live the life you have imagined. I agree that the younger generations can have better ways of doing things but do it with respect. Do it with empathy. Do it with understanding. If elders do not understand, communicate. Maybe you will learn from their experience while they learn from you.
Whichever way, always keep the door open for communication. Again, I reiterate, life is very simple. You get what you give. If you have earned it, the whole universe will work so that you get what you deserve, may it be bad or good.